Self-Care or Self-Soothing?
This week, one of our awesome Seattle nannies, Danielle, asks the question,
“Are you practicing self-care or self-soothing?”
Something to think about as we
head into a new year!
Can you find an article or podcast today that doesn't remind you how important it is to self-care? Do you feel like you're always being told to "fill your cup?" I always thought I was okay at self-care, but I recently learned there is a distinction between self-care and self-soothing and was surprised at the big difference this makes.
I always thought self-care was what I did to unwind after a long day at work - having a big dinner, watching trashy reality TV, and maybe enjoying some ice cream to cap the night off. Turns out this is a common mistake: all of my self-care strategies were actually self-soothing! Self-soothing is doing small things that make you feel better just in that moment, like eating junk food, mindless social media scrolling, or having a glass of wine in a bubble bath.
What I was misunderstanding is that self-care is not a quick, in-the-moment task that will make you feel a little better. Nothing is inherently wrong with self-soothing, but it's not going to make a long-term difference to how you're feeling. It's a band-aid. Self-care is forming healthy habits that actually make your mind & body feel better long-run. Self-care isn't always super comfortable, easy, or fun, but it honestly is a better way to "fill your cup" and make sure you can give your nanny kiddos your all each day.
So what does self-care look like? For me, it was adding more movement to my day. I had to wake up a little earlier in the morning, but I do feel much better having added a consistent work out to my day. Self-care might look like having healthy food options at home that you can readily prepare and enjoy. Self-care is taking things off your plate so you can focus on the things that matter more to you. Self-care can be saying no when you're too busy or too tired. Self-care is drinking water and being kind to yourself (I've had good luck with affirmations).
Self-care isn't as easy as self-soothing, but the benefits sure make a difference. I found that as I added more self-care to my day, I was craving less of my old self-soothing strategies. Taking care of children is fun and rewarding, but it can also be challenging and sometimes even exhausting, too. Please take time to take care of yourself, too, and find what self-care strategies are right for you.
About the Author: Danielle is a certified Positive Discipline parent educator and works full-time as a nanny in Seattle, WA. She has over fifteen years of experience working with children and enjoys spending time with her husband and cats.